THE HASH WEDDING OF COCK KILLER AND FRONTAL LOBOTOMY (GROG!!)

(UNDER THE MISTLETOE)

Opening Hymn # 69

We're here because we're here because

We're here because we're here because we're here (repeat)

RA 
Dearly inebriated, we've cum here today in the presence of this pack to join two of our favourite hashers in Grand Holy Mattress Monkey. In order to make this ceremony as solemn and meaningless as possible I' would first ask that we bow our heads and repeat the sacred prayer.

  Our lager, which art in barrels,

Hallowed be thy drink.

Thy will be drunk, (I will be drunk),

At home as in the tavern.

Give us this day our foamy head,

And forgive us our spillages,

As we forgive those who spill against us.

And lead us not into incarceration,

But deliver us from hangovers.

For thine is the beer,

The bitter and The lager.

Forever and ever,

On On

RA
Whereas Grog (Frontal Lobotomy) did woo Cock Killer with his Diplomatic ways. 
And whereas Cock Killer was thirsty and did partake of Grog (Frontal Lobotomy) thus falling under his spell.

Attesting to their dreary lives, Cock Killer and Frontal Lobotomy (GROG) have now resolved to end each hash by getting lucky without the need for self gratification or technology. 

Therefore by the power vested in me as the VH3 Religious Advisor I will now join Cock Killer and Frontal Lobotomy (GROG) in heavenly bondage. The ties please. (A member of the pack ties the Christmas bow to one of their arms). 

Cock Killer do you take this hasher for better or worse, in vomit and shiggy, with his farts and his snores, to have and to hash until death or whatever do you part? 

Answer- I do.

Frontal Lobotomy (GROG) do you take this scarlet harriette for better or worse, on the rag and in health, on bad hair days and good, to have and to hash until death or whatever do you part? 

Answer- I do.

Please raise your glasses and repeat after me "With this beer I thee wed".

Down Down Song

Today we wed Cock Killer and Frontal Lobotomy (GROG).
We heard them say "I do".
Give it your best for the next many years, but first drink down your beers. Drink it down down...

I now pronounce you hasher and harriette, doomed to spend the rest of your days hashing together. May you go forth and find many new trails with all of their False Trails, On Backs and On Ons. You may now moon or spoon the pack.